Well we got the news recently that Laura is now officially in remission!! But I do believe that she isn't completely 'all clear' as of yet.... She is still pretty ill, she just kinda sleeps a lot, and by a lot I mean like all the time, she kinda reminds me of a hamster, it's not really a nice way to describe her but, well, it fits... She's been eating quite a lot recently -which is good, because her appetite wasn't good at all when she had the Stem Cell transplant - as I said before she sleeps all the time, and because she was on steriods her cheeks have puffed out... she is like a little hamster, bless her. She still needs to drink sterile water and she can't be in a closed space with a large group of people, but she's been shopping a few times recently and I think thats stopped her from going completely crazy. She couldn't believe that it's been two months already since she had the stem cell transplant, I guess the time is going by a lot quicker than she first thought...
It seems like there's finally that silver lining my family have been waiting for. Laura has a Stem Cell Donor. She goes into Isolation for her transplant on the 24th March. She'll be in there for weeks and she'll have to have Radiotherapy, a lot more painful treatment than what she's used to. Don't get me wrong, she's really strong but even though she's had all these different types of Chemotherapy, like in bags or as tablets, she's still stayed srtong, but Mum told me that the doctors said it's alot stronger and it'll take it's toll out on her. The stem cells, because they aren't hers, she'll have to take drugs to stop her body from rejecting them, and she'll be in isolation alot longer than someone who's having their own healthy stem cells put back in their body. My mum was talking to a woman whose daughter is something like 100 days post Stem Cell Transplant, mum needed to kinda mentally prepare herself for what it'll be like, from a mother's point of view. The cells she had transplanted into her were her own. She had cancer (I don't know which type) and was 9 months off being in remission for 5 years when the cancer came back. That's when she needed the transplant. Her mother says she's tried alot but is getting stronger everyday and things are improving.
However, my sister's type of leukemia is Actute Lymphoblastic Leukemia with something called Philadelphia Chromosome, which makes it ''a rarer form but still treatable''. And the stem cells she has had donated to her are from a little boy's umbilicle cord from America. So mum said something about her recovery time being alot longer.
But it isn't just hunky dorey straight after her transplant. Because of the radiotherapy her immune system will be completely gone, not like when she had chemo and she still had some sort of immune system going. Here's some of the things I've been told will happen and what she won't be allowed to do when she comes home:
not allowed around large groups of people.. for obvious reasons.
Any people she does see have to be fit and healthy.
only allowed to eat organic food. nothing that has been processed or treated with pesticides etc.
not allowed to eat certain dairy products. Cheese, yoghurt etc. because of the bacteria in these products
not allowed to cover food up and 'zap' it in the microwave for when she feels hungry
she's allowed to pet our dog, Molly, but hs to wash her hands straight after, and the dog isn't allowed on her bed, in out room, or to lick her face.
the house has to be clean. Dusted, hoovered completely clean everyday.
Thats just a few things. I didn't watch the DVD or read the book that we where given. Neither did Laura. Mum and Dad watched it, and they kinda wished they hadn't. And then when Mum Dad and LAura went to Sheffield Children's hospital, the doctors told them everything. They asked if Laura wanted to stay with Mum and Dad when they were going to be told everything, possible consequences of the treatment, infertility, something wrong with how she walks, possible heart problems. The lot.
My Mum explained that Laura didn't wanna watch the DVD but the doctors asked her any way. She said ''I'm coming in with you. We'll go in as a family.''
When they were told about the possibilities and risks, Mum turned round to Laura and asked her ''Did any of that frighten you? Is there anything that suprised you at all?'' Her reply was this. ''To be honest, nothing suprises me anymore.''
I mean even though there is this ''silver lining'' and this hope, there's still those dark clouds. But I guess thats something that we all have to deal with it, and take it one day at a time.
I'm really open with my sexuality, some people I know question it because of my openness. I'm straight. With a boyfriend of 11 months who has recently become curious of his sexuality.
I'm so open minded when it comes to sexuality. To be honest, I can see attractive attributes in both sexes.
People question my sexuality because I make comments about women, in general and in celebrity. Especially the lads I work with. If a girl comes into the shop that I work in who's attractive, I'll say she is. Or if she isn't that attractive and for example, she has really nice legs, I'll say so. I don't really mind them asking, but sometimes it's the way they do it. Or comments they make.
But I made the mistake of telling a friend about my boyfriend's curiosity. She told someone else. Queue stupid questions.
Friend: ''Would you let him do stuff with a lad while you're still going out with him.'' Me: ''I'd rather him talk to me about it. I'd rather know, if he was thinking of it. Than him doing it and then telling me.''
Friend: ''Would you be afraid of him cheating on you with another lad?'' Me: ''Why should I be afraid of him cheating on me? I'm more afraid of him cheating on me with a girl. It's not him that I don't trust. It's other girls.'' Friend: ''Thats wierd.'' Me: ''How is it? I've always been more wary of girls than lads. Girls are too manipulative and sneaky.'' .... The argument carries on from there. With her saying I'm stupid to be more upset if he cheated on me with a girl or a lad..... Then there's a friend who's Bisexual
This friend I've known for a few years now came out as Bi-sexual a while ago now, when he told me, there was nothing wrong with it. It didn't make me feel any different towards him.In fact, I was happy for him, he seemed a whole lot more relaxed in general after he'd told everyone. But he told me that someone had mentioned him ''coming out'' in a lesson. The teacher heard and described it as ''just a phase'' he was going through and seemed to disapprove of my friend's sexuality.
Then there's just little comments people make. For instance, A friend of mine doesn't like the UK X Factor Winner, Joe McElderry.... Because he ''looks too gay''. That kinda wound me up. I thought we where in a time where people's sexuality shouldn't be as much of a big issue than it was years ago.
Why do people still ask ignorant questions?
I mean, when I first came to know my friend Simon, he came out as gay about 2 years ago, I asked him loads of questions. He saw them as genuine curiosity and that the way I went about it was, as he said, a laugh.
He says ''I'd rather people ask than assume.'' (that was when a teacher complained that I was asking too many personal questions on his sexuality) The thing is about these personal questions is that Simon knows that I get curious very easily and he is very open, and he doesn't mind answering them.
During the run up for University Applications and applying and writing personal statements.... and all that jazz, each student's subject teacher has to write a report on that student. We put down on the piece of paper our grade from last year and what subjects we're thinking of taking in University.
My English Lit teacher gave me my report back... My expected final grade was what I was looking for and he talked about my course and how I am as a person.... he called me ''Zany and almost Eccentric'' I googled it as i had an idea what they meant but wanted to be sure....
Zany - Adjective ludicrously or whimsically comical; clownish Eccentric - Adjective deviating from the recognized or customary character, practice, etc.; irregular; erratic; peculiar; odd:eccentric conduct; an eccentric person.
.... Should I take that as a compliment?
I mean, I get called weird at work all the time, but I guess it's one thing coming from a work colleague and another thing coming from a teacher?
I suppose it's not all that bad though, I received offers from all but one of the Universities I applied to! I guess people like eccentrics....
I've been thinking that for my 18th birthday that I'd really want to get a tattoo. I wouldn't want something that everyone has. Tribal, Chinese writing etc. (although i love stars)
But I want it to really mean something. To show that I've been through rough times (and still am) but everything will work out. I want it to be dedicated to my sister aswell. She's being so brave and I love her so much. She's really fighting a tough battle and I want the admiration I have of her to be inked onto my arm for others to see and and know, not for it to just be in my heart and mind.
But the thing is that I wouldnt want like her face or name. It's something I dont really want to have. But like a picture or symbol to represent the pride I have for her and for it to almost say: ''Yeah, We've been through some tough sh*t in the past.... But we've come out smelling like roses :)''
I want it to be kinda small, as it's a first one - less pain! Then I think as I'm older I'm going to get some more based on experiences and things that have touched my heart.